The view from the outhouse Sunday January 3 Good morning from Silty Slough. I knew it was cold when I went outside in my slippers this morning because I could feel the hair on my bare legs freezing… no I guess it was the hairs in my nose. -24 at sunrise 10:24 this morning. We have lost 21 minutes on the length of the night since the 21st. Did you ever notice almost every time you post the temperature someone always has to top it. It’s fun to play games….when you actually have plus 10 post your temp as -23. I guarantee somebody will top you. Really doesn’t matter the thermometers are not circumcised anyway. I mean synchronized. While I was laying in bed this morning I composed a one line poem. “Shit it’s cold”
The coffee was ready when I came upstairs from my temporary bedroom in the shop. Kari and Jess figured since it was so cold outside I should add a shot of Baileys to their cups so they wouldn’t freeze. I don’t drink coffee, so I missed out. I make it most mornings but have never tasted it. The closest I’ve come is Kahlua.
Roger brought a groomer down last week and did the airstrip and our trails. He left it and I’ve been grooming everything. The trails and strip are smooth and hard as concrete. Last Tuesday we got about 4 inches of wet heavy snow. That evening we were going to take the dogs for a run. Just behind the root cellar a rotten birch tree had fallen across the trail due to the heavy snow. The chainsaws are down at Al’s cabin. Not wanting to walk down there, I held some limbs back and Kari tried to get over the smaller logs. Give it hell Kari. She didn’t quite give it enough hell. The machine jumped the logs and plopped into the thigh deep snow beside the packed trail. Guess we should have walked down and got the saws to start with. It makes a difference walking in heavy boots and winter gear. Much easier to walk in slippers and underwear. Now you see why I don’t get all bundled up to go to the outhouse. I cut enough of the tree to get the machines through and Kari pitched the chunks of wood off the trail, all in the moonlight. How romantic. Kari took the dogs on their run and we left the stuck snow machine and the rest of the tree for tomorrow. Everything is harder in the bush. Wednesday Kari went to Myra’s for coffee. On the way she jerked the stuck snow machine out with a tow strap, living up to her towing nikname Happy Hooker. I planned to cut the rest of the logs to make the opening the width of the trail while she was gone. It surprised me when the cold saw started. One problem the chain was frozen to the bar from cutting the logs in the snow last night. I took it in the shop, had a break, and let it thaw out. Some say unthaw. Mostly ignorant Trump haters that have never done or produced anything in their lives, but don’t get me started today it’s Sunday.
Kari made it back from Myra’s and we started getting things ready for our weekend guests. The guest arrived by snow machine Thursday afternoon. Kari and I made a quick trip to the post office to pick up our mail and mail in job applications for Kari, the dogs, and I. We found out we can work for 3 days, quit, and draw unemployment. I love to take advantage of the stupid Democrats programs. The boys and I didn’t get the $600, I guess they made too much money from their student loans.
New Year’s Eve was good, kind of disappointing. I thought when 2020 was over things would be different, so far no change only colder. I didn’t drink very much, a duck fart, a Tiger Woods, and a Baileys. I guess I’m old, struggled to make it to 12:01, that’s 4:01am for a lot of you reading this, then promptly went to bed.
Friday we had a great meal, prime rib, bacon wrapped scallops, garlic mashed potatoes, green beans, and bread. Not bad for being in the frozen wilderness a hundred miles from the grocery store.
Saturday we relaxed and played board games, talked shit about some relatives, friends, and neighbors. Kari and Jess won’t let me post that. They said if it is true it isn’t shit. I went to bed and they kept talking. I left my phone upstairs recording the shit they were talking about me. But that’s ok I was talking shit to Cooper and Teddy downstairs and they agreed with every word.
Our guests planned to go back home this morning. Too cold they are going to stay another day. Good decision. The colder it is the more landmines there are to get you. If anyone has any topics just PM them, we have another day to talk shit.
It warmed right up to -20 at noon. I’ll bet someone can top this. Can you believe we are out of ice cubes. How can you run out of ice at 20 below. Maybe I should set some trays outside or go cut some blocks out of the river with my chainsaw. Spruce Manor will have an ice maker or no more Tiger Woods for you.
From the frozen asylum high above Silty Slough, have a safe, healthy, and happy New Year my friends.
Good morning and Merry Christmas from Silty Slough. 12 degrees this morning at sunrise 10:29. 5 hours and 12 minutes of daylight, a 3 minute gain since the 21st. I don’t know what to do with all the extra sunshine. Our river community Christmas party was yesterday. Kari was up early cooking and sewing gifts. I had a request to make a pone of cornbread. I’ve been practicing and under the direction of the cornbread guru from north of the Ohio River in Indiana, BobbyRay Howard, I may have it dialed in. The crust was too dark for the first pone, so I ate most of it while the second try was baking. It came out pretty nice if I do say so myself. I took a picture. What do you do with a picture of a pone of cornbread? Post it on Facebook. It has to be smarter looking than Joe Biden. I posted it on the FB Appalachian Americans group since that is where my family is from and it is the capitol of cornbread. I asked for tips and comments not realizing that there would be so much interest in a picture of a pone of cornbread. So far about 3000 likes, 500 comments, a handful of request to send some, several requests to be forwarded to Santa since we are so close to the North Pole, and 3 marriage proposals. I need to see pictures to be sure they are women and a notarized affidavit that they are not Trump haters to even be considered. The party was fine, plenty good food. I didn’t eat much because I was still full of cornbread. Someone forgot the eggnog so I rode back 4 miles to get it. It was mentioned in the planning stages that we would play games after dinner. I don’t play many games, as a matter of fact I would sooner stick needles in my eyes. Instead we had a white elephant gift exchange. Earlier it had been mentioned that even as cold as it is, I was still going to our outhouse in my underwear and slippers. They questioned if I even owned a pair of pants. Not sure how they knew other than FB because the closest neighbor is two miles away. Anyway we drew numbers and started picking, opening, swapping, and stealing presents. Several gifts changed hands multiple times. One minor tussle broke out with all 13 people outside rolling in the snow. I may be embellishing a bit. Maybe it was only 10 people. However we will check the film at 11. After the final trades, I ended up with a nice pair of insulated pants to wear to the outhouse. I think it was all set up while I went after the eggnog. It was a very enjoyable evening. All to soon it was time to pack up and head through the woods over the river and through the woods to Silty Slough. That should be a song. I woke up this morning, no presents under the tree, oh I have to go outside and open up the well that Kari and I got each other for Christmas. Forget that it is under 4 feet of snow. I think I’ll just stay inside and run a bunch of water to appreciate our joint present. Who knows, our present next year may be a septic tank. Then I can take the insulated pants back to the gift exchange next Christmas. I won’t be needing to go outside to the outhouse anymore. I spent most of the day answering the replies from the cornbread posting. I believe that if someone replies to your post they should be acknowledged. It’s like saying hello when someone speaks or walks into the room. Mayor Cooper and his transition team are really settling into politics. It started out I would ask Cooper to give me a paw, he would and then I would give him a chewbie. Now since he is mayor, multiple times a day he just comes up and gives me a paw without being asked, then expects a chewbie. Teddy is very Democratic, he just hangs around and expects a chewbie handout just because Cooper got one. The boys are out on the deck now barking at snow machines passing through the slough without paying the 2 dog biscuit toll that the new mayor came up with. Mayor Cooper has a solution. Obtain a federal grant to get transponders for the snow machines and open slough tolling. People could just put a box of chewbies on deposit. We need a storage building, an administration building, employees…..I think about $7,000,000 will do it. If we hurry we can get it included in the latest Chinese virus relief Bill. We can name it, every good government program has a name, drum roll………..SloughPass. Time for some Christmas phone calls. Then I think the boys and I will try to come up with another money-making scam for them to operate. Surely they don’t put dogs in prison do they? Oh in case you want to share the view go ahead, I need to get the readership up so that Teddy and Cooper can start selling adds. If each of you would share with 2 friends it could really take off. Seems like a little company in Michigan did that with soap. I think I’ll have some cornbread and a glass of milk. Remember keep healthy by taking your vitaminD and staying out of Walmart. From the asylum at Silty Slough, Merry Christmas!!
I woke up about 4 this morning. I can see getting up so early tomorrow morning but Kari and I already have this years present, a well here at the asylum. It is 25 degrees at 6am, we have gained 2 minutes since the solstice. It should really ramp up pretty fast. If I remember correctly we will gain 6-8 minutes a day in a couple months, then the curve will start to flatten. By June 22 we will be headed the other way again. Looks like our chances of a white Christmas are pretty good. We have had over 4 feet of snow this winter. It has flattened down a bit, but will stay with us until May. 3 barrels of fuel followed me and my snow machine home from the landing yesterday so all of our storage is full. Next I will start hauling propane as soon as Bonnie and Clyde are both empty. They are our 100 gallon 440 pound bottles. I named them to keep track of our usage. Number one and two would just be too simple. I have a 220 pounder named Earl that is still full. Tuesday evening Kari and I were packing the landing strip and Roger came by headed down the trail from Skwentna. He asked if I wanted to make a fuel run in the morning. I wasn’t too excited about it, but Kari quickly said, sure he wants to go. Must be something about being together in a 16 x 30 cabin for several months. Anyway I really wanted to go…you know, make hay while the sun shines, or in this case make gas while the snow flies. We got up early Wednesday morning. Kari fixed a nice breakfast of sausage, eggs, and toast. Fixed is an Appalachian term, you don’t make or cook food, you fix it. I guess the eggs were broken and needed to be fixed. Actually Kari broke and froze the eggs several months ago. Machines are fueled, sled loaded with three empty barrels, warmed up and ready to go. It is warm, too warm, 32 degrees. Kari is going to have coffee with Myra again. I guess they didn’t get there discussion about husbands finished during our last trip on Sunday morning. On the river trail to Rogers I could feel my machine sinking in the snow a bit, slipping the track a little. Overflow, keep moving, now is not the time to stop. It isn’t bad but something to think about. There are other spots along the trail that are known to be bad when the conditions are right for overflow. Roger and I talked it over and decided to go. If it is too bad we will turn around and come back home. There were about a dozen spots of overflow along the way. Nothing too long. The trail is flat, the best I can remember. The morning is beautiful. I’m riding with my helmet open and my jacket unzipped. I stopped to take a couple photos of the sunrise. I could see the purple mountains majesty but no amber waves of grain. I made a couple stops to pick up dog booties from the dog teams training for the Iditarod. The dogs wear booties secured by Velcro. They are a throw away item. During the race a team will go through several thousand. I take them home to our dogs. They love them. Kind of like the Goodwill of doggie boots. No they don’t wear them. They carry them around the cabin. They are like their favorite toys. Anyway I was a good doggie daddy and brought them home a few for Christmas. I even brought Kari a few too. It feels so good when you give, no matter what the gift is. Anyway keep moving. In the back of my mind I’m thinking of the return trip. The temps are up, the overflow will be getting worse, and I’m adding 1200 pounds of weight to my sled. We cruised on into the landing in good time. Filled the drums and we were headed home after the 1 hour pit stop. The trip back went smooth and quick. The overflow had increased but not a problem. Roger peeled off again at Fish Lakes Creek and I headed home to Silty Slough. I’m in the cabin at 4:30. Good trip seven and a half hours. I figure that I need to haul about 30 loads this winter to get the material I need up here for the addition to the cabin. We have a few freightdog internships available, poor pay, hard work, long hours, ok accommodations, beautiful scenery, excellent food. Inquire within. I need to take a nap before I “fix” some cornbread for dinner. I told you it was an asylum. From the Silty Slough, stay safe and healthy, my friends. Merry Christmas!!
Good morning from Silty Slough. We made it through the longest night of the year. Now they begin to get shorter. My see pappy machine says I slept a little over 8 hours. It has a modem in it that reports to the government when I’m sleeping, how long, if I hold my breath, etc. I think they just want to see when they can sneak up and take my guns while I’m asleep. I’ll disable it after January 21st. I put up a couple motion detector lights. Some of you liberals may think I’m paranoid about the government, but the light is mostly to check for moose or coyotes before we go out at night. It was snowing when we went to bed. 23 degrees at sunrise and about 5” of new snow. It was pretty deep for my slippers when the dogs and I went out to remark our territory. Back inside all three of us were rewarded with a chewbie for going potty. Kari and I had a good ride to the post office on Thursday to mail the cards. We found out that it doesn’t open on Monday or Thursday morning until after the mail plane arrives. So we ripped a hole in the zip lock bag the cards were in and hung them on the doorknob. A trip to get the mail is a 5 mile ride and if you figure the cost of running 2 snow machines about $20. If the postman brings your mail to the door you are fortunate, don’t be a whiner and complain about the post office.
Roger texted Saturday to see if I wanted to make a one day turn to the landing to haul fuel on Sunday. I didn’t think very long and replied…Sure. Before bedtime I set the alarm for 7 to be ready to meet Roger by his place at 9:15. Kari is planning on going down to have coffee with Myra. We went to bed early. Since I have an air mattress, I think I was dreaming about floating above the earth in a hot air balloon watching Roger and I hauling fuel up the river. All of a sudden something ran into the balloon there is a big woosh of air and I was falling toward the earth. In reality at 5 am Mayor Cooper jumped up on the bed and that’s when things went haywire. I was still half asleep and could feel the mattress rapidly deflating. It seemed like a half a minute and I was flat on the wood floor. Cooper and I haven’t had time for a pedicure lately so I thought one of us may have punctured the mattress. Kari woke up startled and wondered why the automatic inflator was running. I called on my best early morning troubleshooting skills. I figured out that the quick deflating valve had popped open. Snapped it closed and in a couple minutes I was back riding in my hot air balloon. I couldn’t get back to sleep so I lay awake and worked on the addition to the asylum until 7 when the alarm went off. Kari made a huge country breakfast… no I’m dreaming again. I had some breakfast and Kari made sandwiches for Roger and I to eat at the landing. Sleds fueled, oiled, warmed up, and ready to go. I waited on the river and Kari went up to Myra’s to join her for coffee and talk about their husbands. Soon I saw Roger’s headlights coming out to meet me on the river trail. Roger is hauling double freight sleds with 3-55 gallon barrels on each one. I have a single sled with 2 barrels. I’m saving a space to bring back an antique snow machine that I’m fixing up for the grandkids to ride around Silty Slough. Roger is the trail master, he has the contract from the state to mark and groom 60+ miles of trail from the Landing to Skwentna. Previously he marked the trail with 875 markers. That works out to a marker about every 360 feet, some a little farther apart on the straightaways and some closer in the turns. Today will be stop and go into the landing while Roger adds, replaces, and straightens up the markers. He is pretty good at doing it on the fly. I am following behind and can see him reaching back over his shoulder and getting another marker from his quiver. 60 markers added today. The weather is pretty good, warm in the 20s. There is very light freezing rain most of the way coating the windshield. I’m still riding with my helmet open. The rain changed to snow about Scary Tree with about 17 miles to go to the landing. There is a lot of flat light so the bumps and dips are hard to see. The reflectors on the trail markers are a welcome site. The worse the weather the more welcome they are. Thank you Roger for doing such a good job. About an hour from Scary Tree we are at the landing. Roger is filling his 330 gallons of barrels and I pulled in front of our stall to drag the little snow machine out and load it on the back of the sled. I feel like I’m getting stronger than I was a couple years ago. Roger helped me tie it down and we ate our sandwiches and fruit cake. I pumped 103 gallons of jet fuel into the barrels and 8.9 gallons of gas into my machine. Snow machines are not exactly high mileage vehicles, but if Joe and Ho have their way they will be solar powered. Good luck with that. Time to hit the dusty trail, still snowing. There is quite a bit of open water to go around right out of the landing but the trail is a good safe distance away from it. Roger has it marked up real well. You still see tracks where people take short cuts and risk it. The light is still flat hard to see. Last trip we passed a couple guys ice fishing on the Su. I’d never seen anyone ice fish on the river. Turns out they were fish and game guys doing a survey for burbot. They are supposed to be good fish to eat. I don’t ice fish, it is one of the three unnatural acts along with jumping out of airplanes and same sex sex. Just a little farther down the Su the visibility was really bad, Roger got off the side of the trail a little bit and stopped. Normally you can just keep moving and ride it out. This time the river left a log in the way and the rear ski on the front sled hooked it. Too bad we can’t hook a burbot as easily. Roger unhooked both of his sleds, put a rope on the back of the first sled, and pulled it sideways off the log. He hooked onto the hitch with the rope and pulled it ahead on the trail. He pulled the back sled out with the short rope, hooked everything back up, and we were on our way again. Another cats ass trophy narrowly averted. (Don’t know how to spell catastrophe). The snow changed back to freezing rain about Scary Tree. We kept ginning along up the Yentna River in the flat light. I couldn’t wait for it to get dark so I could see again. In about 35 miles Roger peeled off into Fish Lakes Creek to drop the back sled off for delivery tomorrow. I continued home to Silty Slough. Nothing that needed to be unloaded tonight. Kari had a nice pork roast ready to eat. Everything tastes better at the cabin. We passed snow machiners both ways on the trip but we didn’t get close to another soul. Bet all of you can’t do that. I wore my mask the whole way to keep my nose warm. Yesterday Kari and I went out to pack the trails, put black garbage bags on the lath marking the runway, and let the boys get some exercise. We also packed the fresh snow on the landing strip in the slough and straightened out the dogleg at the west end. Then it’s back to the cabin to unload the sled from yesterday and transfer the fuel into our tanks in case Roger wants to make another trip before Christmas.
Today is laundry day. We need to pack the trails and runway again. I don’t know why Mayor Cooper appointed Kari and I to the Silty Slough Road Comission. I’m ready to resign. It is a lot of work to live out here. There is no serviceman to call when things go wrong. You just figure it out. It is also relaxing, quiet, beautiful scenery, and the trails on our property are like being in a park. It’s a great place to avoid the Chinese virus and wait for things to head back toward normal if that is possible.
Stay safe and healthy my friends and again Merry Christmas.
Hello all from Silty Slough. 13 degrees this morning when the sun rose at 10:29 and set at 3:38 for the shortest day of the year, 5 hours and 9 minutes. I thought we would go below 5 hours before we managed to flatten the downward curve and start to gain daylight again. I guess we need to be a couple hundred miles farther north to sag below the 5 hour mark. This is also the longest night of the winter if you want to look at it that way. Depending if you are a pessimist or a nocturnal optimist. I was wondering the other morning when I couldn’t get back to sleep at 4, is a pessimistic pessimist really an optimist?
Last Sunday the 13th Roger text and asked if I wanted to go to town Monday and come back out on Tuesday. He had a snow machine to pick up at the landing and I had one that he could drop off there. Sure. Roger arrived at our place at 8:15 for the trip. Kari and I had our freight sled loaded with 8 totes of trash, 3-33 pound propane bottles, and 4-20 pound bottles. I hooked a tub sled behind the freight sled and had 2-100 pound propane bottles in it. We left Kari and the dogs to run the asylum and headed on the trail through the woods and down the ramp to the slough and onto the river trail. It is about 15 degrees so I was able to ride with my helmet open and after 15 minutes or so I was farther from the cabin than I had been in 12 weeks. The main reason for me going to town was a box of Christmas cards and two boxes of contacts. When I was getting ready the morning of the trip Kari found my boxes of contacts. I can’t come back to the cabin with an empty sled so Kari got busy on our AnyList app. Soon there were 45 items at Costco, 2 spare snow machine belts at SkiDoo, a stop at Lowe’s, orders to pick up at Fred Meyer, and a stop at Carr’s for dried fruit for making my fruitcake. Roger and I hit the ground running when we reached the landing. I dropped Roger off at Willow airport to retrieve his truck from under at least 3 feet of snow and headed on to Wasilla for belts and Arby’s. They have 2 sandwiches for $6, I haven’t had fast food for over 3 months so I got 4 for $12 so I could have some later or take a couple back to the cabin. Then to the landfill at Palmer. It was windy there as usual. I just rode 60 miles on a snow machine no problem. I thought I was going to freeze to death in the 5 minutes it took to unload the trash. Then on to get the propane bottles filled and I was out of time for a trip on to Anchorage to Costco. I’ll go there tomorrow. It has been a long day and I’m really tired and a little sore from the first long ride of the year. I was at Costco when they opened at 9 for old people’s hours. AnyList is a good app because it syncs the list on Kari’s and my phone. Then it is also a bad thing because she was adding things as I shopped. I was bouncing from one side of Costco to the other like a ping pong ball. Took more time than I had budgeted. I grabbed a world famous Costco hot dog and headed back for the Valley and Wolf Lake. It is almost noon and I’m already tired. I asked Roger about delaying until Wednesday morning and he said no problem. We made a run 45 miles back to the landing to drop off the propane and pick up the trash that wouldn’t fit in my pickup the day before. Back to the landfill and a couple stops in Palmer. I think I have everything on the list so far. The last message was Fred Meyer has turkeys for 69 cents a pound. I don’t care if they are free, I’m not going into another store this year. Time for a pizza and a Tiger Woods or two or three. I planned to be up at 6 to get everything packed into totes for the return trip. I overslept and when I got up at 7:30 Roger was already loading the trucks. I finished packing all the treasures in the totes and we were on our way to the landing by 8:30. We got everything loaded and tied down, machines fueled, and on the trail. It was forecast to be sunny but that didn’t happen. We had flat light for a lot of the trip, couldn’t see anything. It was very difficult to keep it between the white lines. A lot of the time we just felt our way along. At our first stop Roger asked if he was travel too fast. I said “No, let the hog eat.” About 20-22 miles an hour is a good speed when pulling a freight sled. The trail is excellent this year. Some years I have made the trip at 7-10 miles an hour because the trail was so rough. We moved right along passing the familiar landmarks, The Deshka, Rolly Creek, Scary Tree, Luces, Yentna Station, Moose Creek, The Kahiltna, Imm’s, McDougal Lodge, Lake Creek, and Fish Lakes Creek. Roger peeled off to go to his place, I continued on by John’s Slough and on into Silty Slough. Up the ramp, through the woods and home again. Unload the 8 totes of supplies and get them inside. The propane can wait until tomorrow. Kari got the Christmas cards addressed. Tomorrow at 9 she and I are going to be 5 miles up river at the Skwentna Post Office to get the cards on the mail plane. BTW I couldn’t find any boxes of cards in town. I did find some cards and a bottle of white out in the hangar while I was looking for wrapping paper. So if you get a recycled card please understand. 124 miles by snow machine and 190 miles by truck to get you a Christmas card and me a home made fruit cake. I guess it is the thought that counts. Roger texted Saturday to see if I wanted to make a fuel run to the landing on Monday. Sure….but that’s for another view. From the asylum on the bluff high above Silty Slough, we wish you a very Merry Christmas!!
Hello from Silty Slough. The sun got up at 10:18 this morning and will go back to bed at 3:38. That’s 5 hours 20 minutes for those of you that aren’t good at math. We should dip below 5 hours of daylight by the 21st unless a big meteorite hits the earth and changes the 23 degree tilt of its axis. After all it is 2020 so expect anything. 22 degrees when the boys and I went out this morning. Forecast for tonight is 3. I guess I’m going to have to start wearing more than underwear and slippers pretty soon. Kari didn’t sleep much last night so she is taking a nap. The boys and I have to be quiet so it is a good time for the view. Our plans on Sunday were to go to the post office on Tuesday afternoon and then get everything ready to make a quick trip to town Wednesday. Al Gore didn’t cooperate with us and warmed everything up. The river trail got some overflow and was too mushy to ride on. Looks like we are missing the window for a trip to town so we can be back to quarantine before the neighborhood Christmas party. If I were getting windows for the addition this trip, I would be missing the window for the windows. The big reason for the trip was a box or two of Christmas cards, we are pretty good on everything else in Kari’s warehouse. Our sweet potatoes molded so we had to pitch them. (10 pounds) Next time we will store them differently. I guess no fried sweet potatoes for a while. Kari has canned from the store but they don’t fry very well. If you have never had fried sweet potatoes you must try some, it’s an Appalachian thing. So if you don’t get a Christmas card or a sweet potato pie you can blame it on Al Gore. It is very important now to have someone to blame other than yourself. Just trying to make a start to get along with the Trump haters. Actually it is still a bit early to run the river. This is the first year we have been out here for the big freeze up. In the past we didn’t make it out until the first of January. This is still the best place to be. We heard that the Chinese virus has moved into the neighborhood at Wolf Lake. Our big activity each day is taking the boys on a run. No we don’t run. The boys run, we ride the snow machines pulling tub sleds to pack the trails. We are seeing some animal tracks along the trails. Some moose and at least one coyote has been here. We marked the runway a couple days ago and I tracked the coyote from around our cabin, along the trail to Steve’s cabin then down the ramp onto the airstrip. Hopefully he was just passing through.
Time to fill both of my weekly pill boxes. 14 days worth. Blood pressure pill, vitamins, and supplements. I try not to take any medicine unless I absolutely have to. When I do take something the minimum dosage usually works. Doctor Kari keeps asking about the gout in my toe. She just wants to give me some more of that witches brew to see the awful look on my face. I told her my toe is just fine now. Like I was saying the one and only dose worked. Really it only hurts when I walk. I’m filling my pill boxes for the fourth time I think. I’m only one day behind, today I took Wednesdays pills. I’ve been up here a little over 8 weeks now. Plan is to go to town in 3 or 4 more weeks. How’s that for social distancing?
I didn’t wake up during the night to check on the Northern Lights. They are supposed to be visible from the northern US for a couple nights. Be sure to look for the Christmas star on the 21st when I think Saturn and Jupiter align. Now I have to go outside to get a view of the northern sky. It will be nice to have north facing windows when we get the addition on Spruce Manor.
The last of the leftover turkey made it into a pot pie. Now what are we going to do with half of a leftover turkey pot pie? I think I’m going to go out to the river today and cut a hole in the ice along the bank to get some snow clams. I really have a taste for some snow clam chowder. I think smoked oyster crackers would be good with it. I’ll have to get the smoker going. What do you think?
Not much else is happening here at the slough. May go to the post office tomorrow. Never any ducks in condo #45 just bills.
Mt. McKinley 20,321 feet is about 100 miles away. Mt. Foraker on the left. Mt. McKinley on the right. Soup beans, taters, cornbread, and onion
Good morning from Silty Slough. I woke up just before sunrise this morning, maybe a great dinner, wine, and a movie had something to do with it. Maybe just the wine. Mr Fahrenheit says -17. He isn’t shaking on the wall yet but much colder and he will start. Speaking of shaking on the wall, we keep hearing forecast of a 6.5 – 7.5 earthquake that is supposed to happen. Was supposed to be Dec 2 or 3, now a moving target. I don’t know how that they can zero it in so close when quakes are up to 50+ miles below the surface. We were lucky figuring out where water was at 100 feet. There was a 3.0 quake 36 miles east of here 36 miles deep yesterday afternoon, didn’t feel it. Alaska rocks and rolls everyday, it’s a big state. I suppose we don’t even notice 98% of the quakes or we mistake them for one of the dogs jumping on the bed. The good news is the living quarters in the cabin is above the shop so we won’t be very deep in the pile when they dig for us. I guess I could make a sacrifice to the earthquake gods and bury our tv. The ground is frozen, so that’s a bad idea. How does the earth quake or crack anyway, it’s so frozen I can’t even dig in it with my Kubota.
The sun rose at 10:10 and the big ball will roll right along the ridge behind the cabin and fall off the back at 3:42. Five hours and thirty two minutes of sand falling through the hour glass.
Mayor Cooper is going to start accepting comments on a study to appoint a commission to draft a proposal to make changes in the way the Silty Slough Department of Environmental Science reports temperatures. Cooper proposes to do the thermometer just like daylight savings time. In the winter temperatures will be reported in Fahrenheit and the spring when the clocks change we will report in Celsius. When it is 68F in the summer it will be reported as 20 degrees C so it won’t seem so hot. Fahrenheit will make the winter temperatures seem warmer. This is a great solution to global warming or cooling. If you have a thermometer that does not read Celsius you may apply to the Thermometer Adjustment Board and receive a waiver after making application and paying the filing fee. Indoor thermostats my be exempted without application, just send the filing fee to city hall. This is Coopers epic government program to be followed by even more. It puts people to work, generates revenue for other epic programs, and causes mass confusion just like a good government program should do. Like most members of congress, Cooper hasn’t learned to read yet, he will just rubber stamp it into law as written with his paw print to get the revenue flowing.
Thursday I was looking on the Appalachian Americans group and saw a meal for supper Soup beans, corn bread, onion, and taters. Arsh taters as my ancestors called them. Appalachian for Irish potatoes. Kari got the beans soaking for tomorrow’s evening meal. Friday was cold about zero so I stayed in the shop and sharpened about three dozen kitchen knives. Now I don’t know why we need so many. I guess everything just ends up at the cabin. That morning I dug through 2 chest freezers to find a piece of pork belly for the beans. Why is it everything you need in a chest freezer is at the bottom, then even if you take something out the rest of the stuff won’t fit back in. Later in the afternoon Kari started the beans cooking. I went to the root cellar and got potatoes that we had helped plant and dig along Bentalit airstrip. Kari sliced them with one of the now two dozen sharp knives that made it back to the kitchen. You have to expect a few losses in a big operation. I was appointed to make the cornbread since I had complained about the last batch being too thick, wrong texture, and crumbly. Well if you can do better…. I must not fail. I asked for recipes from the Appalachian Americans group, even ended up with a few more readers of the view from the outhouse. After I combined several recipes and the recipes on the cornmeal packages along with my memory of watching my mother and grandpaw, I headed off into uncharted territory. Not knowing what I’m doing has never stopped me before. I looked at the cornmeal supply, checked the texture, and selected the courser grind that we had, rounded up the rest of the ingredients, and preheated the oven and iron skillet to 450. I poured the mixture into the hot skillet, set the timer for 25 minutes, and sliced the onion. Kari had the table set and the taters fried. The beans are ready, the bread is done, I love it when a plan comes together. I done good for a first attempt, Kari done good too. Excellent supper.
Striving for excellence I consulted with the Cornbread Guru north of the Ohio River BobbyRay Howard. We agreed on a couple points from the gospel according to cornbread Cornbread is always broken never cut. If you put sugar in cornbread you don’t love the Lord. He shared his recipe with me so I can do some fine tuning. Little cooler, little runnier batter….I would post it here but it is top secret and I would have to kill you. Maybe I could share it with a couple Trump haters. Just kidding. haha. I need to weigh in with my friend Cornbread from Michigan aka Poot Bachner. Surely with the name Cornbread he can bake a world class pone. Like the Democrats I will do anything to win The Great Silty Slough Cornbread Cookoff that mayor Cooper plans as soon as we get rid of this Chinese….. no wait. We can keep everything locked down and eliminate any viable competitors. I won’t even have to try. I can stay in the root cellar and still be sure to win.
By the way will I have to set the oven in Fahrenheit or Celsius? I’ll have to ask Cooper.
From the Asylum high above Silty Slough, stay safe and healthy my friends!
French braised short ribs. Bread and dessert. Cooper loves to lay in the snow. Teddy likes the bed. The boys are afraid of the vacuum.
The view from the outhouse. Tuesday November 24 Hello from Silty Slough. Clear skies and 10 degrees on the plus side of zero. I’m going through a lot of chewbies to lure the dogs back inside when they go out. They have a fur coat and I don’t so I can’t just hang around outside while they make their rounds. I also award myself a couple of leftover Halloween chewbies every time they go out. Two trips up and down the stairs should zero me out. The trips are a bit more difficult now. A couple days ago I woke up with a sore right foot. Wasn’t too bad during the day but at night I couldn’t get the dull ache to stop. Last night Kari decided to try making French food. I’m thinking I really like fries. No this is French braised short ribs. When I went to Costco several months ago I bought the wrong kind of ribs. So the cook is making do. Now thanks to management I have the AnyList app on my phone. It’s a great shopping list. You can sort it lots of ways. I like to sort by store. It even shows a picture of the exact item I’m supposed to buy. I’m not saying management is picky but if our bed had a sleep number hers would have to be set accurate to 3 decimal places. AnyList is getting me ready for the new government control. Management can watch on her phone as I shop, add things, take away things, wonder why I’m not shopping fast enough, etc. She can also look at the bank app to see if I spent any extra money on chewbies for me and the boys. Get used to it folks. It is coming to a local very close to you. I hear Gates and company want to chip everyone. I think the boys can get it out of my arm in no time. You should see what they do to a $15 squeaky toy. Anyway back to dinner. (French)Short ribs over mashed potatoes, home made bread, and a pumpkin dessert. Absolutely awesome. I could see the Eiffel Tower from the outhouse window. I never did see any fries. Now Kari takes off the chef hat and puts on her doctor hat, not really a hat but an LED headlampto take a look at my sore foot. I’ll share my theory someday about how lightbulbs don’t make light but suck darkness instead. Later. The doc gets me on the operating sofa and turns this headlamp on that is as bright as the sun, just to shine in my eyes so I can’t see what is going on. She pokes a big needle along side of the nail on my big toe. Just checking to see if it is infected again like before. Blake Sheldon popped into my head “He stuck that needle down deep in my gum.” Then we soak my foot in boiling water and epsom salt. No infection only blood. Now doc gets on the internet to consult with a specialist named Bubba. They deduce with the accuracy of a political poll that it may be gout. Now I don’t want it to be gout because I associate that with old age. I guess we are going to treat for gout. Doc makes up this concoction of apple cider vinegar, turmeric, lemon juice, swamp water, a few drops of used diesel oil, a ravens eye, and I don’t know what else. She handed it to me with a bottle of water for a chaser and said to drink it down. The ravens eye was looking right at me. It wasn’t bad, it was really really really bad. The door and windows are frozen shut upstairs, so I can’t spit it out on the deck, my foot hurts too bad to run downstairs and out the door, so I swallowed it. Bubbas instructions were to take 2 Advil, elevate and ice my foot, and read more on the internet in the morning. Didn’t we just boil my foot? Now we are icing it. What are we doing getting it ready for home canning? I woke up at 4:45 this morning trying to be quiet and not wake the doc up, I can’t take a second dose of Bubba’s medicine. I went downstairs as fast as I could quietly and barely made it to the outhouse. Bubbas medicine sure cleans you out. My foot actually feels pretty good. When I came back in the chef hat is baking blueberry muffins, the doc hat is brewing ginger and lemon tea. Let me tell you ginger tea doesn’t taste anything like ginger bread or ginger snaps. The muffins were really good though. I think I like the chef hat better. Doc asks how my foot is and I let her know that it is way better. She said she was doing more reading on the internet and Bubba said that if you did nothing it would go away within 12-24 hours. Go figure. How do we know if it was a successful treatment or if it just went away by itself? I guess a lot of things are like that. The tea and muffins made me sleepy so I laid back down for another nap until 10:30. I may try to milk this foot thing a while longer. Teddy and Cooper think a batch of snickerdoodles may help. So that folks is how it is, another shitty day in the paradise of the life in the bush. Stay safe and healthy my friends.
Thank you Lord for modern medicine.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Thursday November 26, 2020
More snow. Whatever we get we keep all winter.
The view from the outhouse Thursday November 26 HAPPY THANKSGIVING from Silty Slough!! 12 degrees this morning, it snowed 3 or 4 inches overnight and made everything clean and pretty for the holiday. Sunrise is in another hour at 9:47 and will hide again for the evening at 3:56. 6 hours and 9 minutes of daylight, the rows are definitely getting shorter now. Snow is forecast again for this evening. Kari baked pumpkin pies yesterday and I cleared the snow off the deck. I think I can milk this sore foot one more day. The boys are still holding out for Snickerdoodles. This afternoon while all of you are having your follow up meal we are going to actually ride over the river and through the woods on our snow machines to our neighbors to celebrate Thanksgiving. Our clocks are 3-4 hours behind most of you. When I wake up and see BobbyRay Howard’s beautiful sunrise photos he is getting ready for lunch. Then not too long after I have lunch he is posting sunset photos. I have the time zone concept pretty well covered. It took me quite a while to grasp crossing the international date line when I started flying across the Pacific Ocean. How can I fly 7 hours west and be into tomorrow 19 hours ahead of home in Alaska. Once when I was in London I went to the Royal Observatory in Greenwich and stood on the zero longitude line where time is referenced to. Greenwich Mean Time, GMT, or Zulu was what my working life was based on for 37 years. It still didn’t help with the International Date Line, that’s half way around the world from Greenwich and very hard to stand on. Aren’t you very sorry that you asked me what time it is? One more short tale and I will leave you alone. I may have told this I can’t remember, if I already have I’m counting on you not remembering it either. In a previous life I was flying a charter trip for the military. We deadheaded to Bucharest, Romania and took a van to Constanta to pick up our 747 in a couple days. It was the day before Thanksgiving but they don’t know about Thanksgiving here, at least it seems. We stayed in a nice resort on the Black Sea but it was off season and we were the only ones there. Some of the crew wanted to go shopping and we got the van to take us to the mall. I was looking for a Starbucks to get mug for my collection of everywhere I’d been in the 747-400. Every store in the mall had a sign in the window advertising “Black Friday Sale” Now they don’t do Thanksgiving but they are all in for Black Friday. Amazing the power of the internet and the quest for the almighty dollar. I know this has been a rough year for many people. I worry for those that don’t have enough of what they need. Everyone can still look around and find much to be thankful for. We need to be thankful for those that can’t be with us, those that we miss, and those that have been taken from us. Our comfort in this is they are waiting for us in heaven. I’m sure these storms of life will eventually end. Then there will be other storms to test us and shape us into who we are. I wish all of you good health and safety, my friends. Have a Very Happy Thanksgiving!!
Thank you Lord for your many blessings!!
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Sunday November 29, 2020
Good morning from Silty Slough. 21 degrees at 6:45. It will be daylight at 9:55 and the sun will hide again at 3:51. We have slipped 4 minutes below 6 hours of daylight. Only 23 more days and the losses will turn back positive. I’ve heard promises like this in the past from my financial advisor. The length of the days increasing is a pretty sure thing unless the Democrats can find a way to screw that up to blame it on Trump. There was only about an inch of new snow overnight unlike Thursday night when it snowed another 15 inches. A lot of good it did to clear 4” off the deck on Wednesday. I told management that I could just wait, but she wouldn’t listen. I see from posts that there are paper shortages again. Makes sense the hoarders have used up the 6 month supply they scarfed up in April. I don’t know about your household but we go to the outhouse about the same frequency day after day, week after week, year after year. We use about the same amount of paper each time. Why is there a shortage? Maybe being locked up our arses have gotten fatter and we have to use more paper. Due to the lockdowns maybe you don’t go to the neighbors and poop. I don’t know. I saw a post where this tribe of Trump haters were complaining about the shortage. One said she got hers last week and now she has tons. Duh aren’t people like you the problem? Now the rest of the tribe can’t find any. Then they send each other on a scavenger hunt for a roll of toilet paper. They had a roll at Dollar General 15 minutes ago, the truck delivers at Kroger at 6am, Costco has it but they have a limit1(isn’t that terrible to limit me?), just go to the neighborsand poop. I wanted to make a reply, but you are not allowed to disagree on their wall. If we run short of toilet paper here at the asylum I have an emergency plan. We have a pump sprayer that Kari uses for bear baiting. I am going to modify the nozzle and mount it to the seat in the outhouse. A hand operated bidet in the wilderness. I just have to work out a few problems with the fluid freezing. Maybe I can add some salt or alcohol. I’ll get the cook to test it out. Another bonus the bear bait leaves a sweet cherry smell. This morning the cook was baking something for breakfast. I asked what. She said stones. Now I know it is bad when Teddy eats rocks so I made some toast. Then she comes out with this beautiful pan of scones. I guess my hearing aids weren’t warm and up to speed yet. Too many years listing to the wind noise in the 747. Since we are almost out of leftovers Kari is cooking a turkey today. We aren’t going to eat it today, just going to put it in the refrigerator and pick away at it for the next week. I hope she makes some left over dressing and sweet potatoes to go with it. Friday was a normal day in the bush. We decided to pack the 15” of new snow before the next wave gets here. Kari and I suited up, warmed up the machines, and headed through the woods packing and widening the trail. I ventured down the ramp into the slough. The snow was piling up in front of my machine and I was a snow plow instead of a snow machine. I got off the previously packed trail into 3 feet of soft snow with a heavy machine. 20 minutes or so of tromping around the machine and packing a path and I was out. Back at the cabin we packed most of the yard. I shoveled the entryway to the root cellar. We decided to hook up to the freight sleds to move them around and get them on top of the snow. About 2 hours of digging, pulling, jerking, hooking, unhooking, and hooking 2 machines together, we had the sleds gliding on top of the snow with the boys riding on the decks. This was one of the days I wanted to call the airplane to come and get us. Where would we go? Back to uncivilization, no toilet paper, empty pantry and freezers, and the Chinese virus lurking at every corner, I don’t think so. The bad days out here are still better than anywhere else. The dogs are so much happier out here. When we go back to Wolf Lake they get depressed in a very short time. I’ve seen dogs in New York City that have never been off a leash outside. You bleeding hearts that are looking for a cause need to jump right on that. Saturday was a great day. We went over to our neighbors for a visit. Nice ride on the frozen river. We can home and rode all the trails again to firm them up. Just a fun day. Cancel the airplane I’m staying. We have to anyway, the boys won’t leave. Stay safe and healthy, my friends.
Thank you Lord.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Thursday December 3, 2020
Good morning from Silty Slough. I’m awake at 5 it is 14 degrees here with only 5 hours to go until sunrise at 10:04. The sun will rise in the southeast just above the higher terrain behind the cabin and disappear from the southwest sky at 3:45. Five hours and forty one minutes to soak up the rays today. At least it is partly cloudy. The moon was big and bright when I went outside with the boys.
Kari cooked the turkey on Sunday and the Phillips came over for a nice meal. Now most of the leftovers are gone.
Monday the dogs needed some exercise so we went down to the slough and widened, packed, and straightened the airstrip in case anyone wants to land their ski plane and deliver ice cream. Butter pecan, moose tracks, or vanilla would be fine. A little dogleg to a water hazard may be ok on the golf course but on the winter landing strip not so good. The strip is in pretty good shape now ready to mark with lath and black garbage bags that will show up in the snow. It helps with your depth reception when landing. I was told once after a firm landing in a DC9 that I must have the depth reception of a full grown piss ant. That’s why I liked the 747, there is a little man somewhere downstairs that calls out your height above the runway. Yes I know I go to wedding perceptions too. It snowed another foot Monday night and continued during the day Tuesday.
Roger and another neighbor Andy Franks were going to go to the post office and asked if I wanted to go. I thought about being a woos and just staying inside but it was warm so I decided to tag along. It was still snowing pretty good when I left the asylum. I made one pass down the runway in about a foot of snow. On the way back I could see the headlights headed my way. Right on time. Our watches must be circumcised. They were each pulling a tub sled and didn’t slow down, I joined the parade. I normally ride wearing a helmet and contacts, but a helmet, hearing aids, and glasses don’t play together very well. I only have two pairs of contacts at the cabin and am saving them for the trip to the landing. I have more at Wolf Lake. Don’t know why Kari let me forget them there. It is warm so just a face mask is fine. My glasses fog up when I’m not moving and the snow builds up on them when I am. The light is very flat and it is hard to see the one lane trail. Roger is leading the pack, Andy and I are running on the sides to widen it out a bit. I’m running with my left ski in the deep snow and the right one in the trail. With my glasses iced and fogged up I’m just barely able to keep it between the white lines. Somewhere along the way, I fell off the left side and out into the really deep snow of never never land. I jumped over to the right side of the machine to bring it back and in the process hit the kill switch. Dead in the water, snow in this case. I have to hurry, if I get stuck and fall behind they will be pissed. I started my machine and was happy it popped right out and I steered it back to the trail. Our tiny parade made the left turn onto the Skwentna River, it is snowing harder now, big flakes that look like feathers. I can see that the grand marshal has stopped up ahead, Andy is stopped a hundred yards behind him and I stopped behind him. Looks like overflow on the river. Roger is digging and Andy goes down to help and also gets stuck. I wait on the high ground, we don’t want all 3 machines stuck. Roger finally got out, packed a trail, then went back and pulled Andy out. There was a slough off to our right. Roger headed over there and broke a trail on to the post office for us. We loaded the packages and mail onto the sleds and headed back down the river toward home. The trip back to Silty Slough was quick and easy without incident. Roger and Andy waved and I headed up our ramp and through the woods back to the asylum. What a tremendous amount of fun it was just to mail a handful of Christmas cards.
Tuesday night the rain started and it rained all night. I can only imagine how much snow that would have been. Wednesday we were breaking through the packed snow walking to the outhouse. I don’t like this because it is hard on Kari’s new knees and I can’t wear just my slippers. The rain reduced the foot of snow we had to about 6” of really good wet snow. Late in the day we decided to pack the trails and move the freight sleds up on top of the new snow. We each pull a tub sled, Kari’s is full of snow and mine is loaded with old batteries and snow. It didn’t take long to get everything packed. We decided to leave the strip alone. The first freight sled pulled out ok, it is narrower with narrow skis. The bigger one has big feet. Great for hauling a heavy load on a packed trail, but in deep snow not so much. I tied a 6’ tow strap to the tongue of the sled and hooked it to Kari’s machine. About 4 good jerks and it was out of its hole. A couple trips around the yard and a trip up and around the root cellar shined the skis right up. Shovel the outhouse and generator step and it’s time to call it a day. Time to polish of the rest of the turkey and have a Tiger Woods or two. Dinner and a movie in the frozen wilderness. Thursday morning everything is frozen again. We made a good decision packing the trails and moving the sleds last night.
I posted earlier about the joys of snow machining. If you get a chance scroll back and read it. When we first bought our snow machines they were a toy to go out and ride to have fun. Now our snow machines are for hauling freight and our primary mode of transportation out here for 5-6 months of the year.
My disclaimer. The dates, times, and measurements may be misconstrued, but it all comes out in the wash.
Stay safe and healthy my friends, keep out of Walmart if you can.
The view from the outhouse Saturday November 7 18 degrees this morning. It’s a really gloomy day. The forecast was for a huge winter storm this afternoon and tomorrow. I wasn’t counting on it. The Alaska forecasts are about as accurate as a presidential election poll. Kari and I made the big switch today. 4 wheelers put away and the snow machines out. I can’t get too close to her because the Silty Slough Department of Health instituted a 14 day quarantine for anyone arriving. She has been staying at the neighbors cabin. It isn’t quite as warm and comfortable as my cabin but adequate. Some people have been asking about the mayors election results. We are still waiting on the mail in ballots to arrive from the post office. The mail plane comes again Tuesday. I saw a couple snow machines go by this afternoon so it shouldn’t be too long before we can get to the post office. I’m afraid the boys are getting ready to withdraw before or resign shortly after the election. I think they are more interested in rolling in coyote shit than they are in politics. Can’t blame them the result is the same. But until then Teddy and I are selling “I voted” Sharpie pens. This is a great gift for those of you that didn’t get an I voted sticker. We are also taking pre-orders for commemorative hand cancelled mailed in ballots. These are post marked Nov. 3. Please let us know how many you want so that we can get them made up. Teddy is slow at cancelling. Everyone remember “We will cheat the Trump Haters and pass the savings on to you”. Our website notrumphatersinSiltySlough. com. The snow started at 3 as forecast. Supposed to get 9-20 inches. The road commission will have to hit the trails and get everything packed down. Teddy loves to ride on the machine, Cooper not so much. As soon as we get enough snow we will stake out a runway in the slough and pack the snow for ski planes. Tomorrow is Sunday, I hope all you Trump Haters go to church and think about how you voted for the people that voted to kill babies. I think abortion is ok in limited case, like if we could make it retroactive for certain individuals like CNN and MSNBC commentators, and Joe and Kamala. I haven’t heard about any burning and looting here in the slough. It may start after all the election litigation. I also haven’t heard anything from the Trump Haters. They must be back in the bunker with Joe. If I was Joe I would be more afraid of the Clintons than Trump. You spineless worms have called me, a cult member, a moron, a Trumpster, from Oklahoma a Trumpett, among other things, when all I want to be is mayor of Silty Slough. I can’t believe that not one Trump Hater will admit that these vote totals seem fishy. Are you that ignorant or is getting rid of Trump worth throwing away your morals and integrity. Not me. Count everyone’s legal vote and whoever wins I will go with that. Remember it’s not over until it is over. Please message me for the Keto version, not sugar coated. Sorry for no pictures, it is dark out, the last time I flashed I got in trouble.
Kari’s quarantine is waved for the evening. We are having fried chicken and potatoes.
I wish you good health and safety my friends
Thank you Lord for the snow…and the chicken.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Monday November 9, 2020
The view from the outhouse Monday November 9 Goooood Morning Silty Slough!! It’s a balmy 30 degrees with 18-20 inches of snow on the ground. Just had to say that after watching Robin Williams in Good Morning Vietnam the other night. When I ever refer to the other night it could be last night or any night within the past 6-8 years. I made the big switch from slippers to snow boots for the trek to the outhouse this morning. Picture attached for proof. I forgot you had to tie them. I’m not in the habit of tying them anyway. The snow was really cold on my hands and bare legs when I got tangled in the laces and tripped. I got one caught in the snow machine track once. They are old so luckily it broke right off. I don’t have to worry about tripping on that one anymore. Kari and I took the snow machines out yesterday afternoon and packed the trails. The boys had a great time in the snow. Teddy likes to ride. Cooper got so tired he finally gave in and rode back home in my lap. Kari gave her knee a good test and did fine. I think she picked up a few more degrees of flex. From confidential sources and my view of Russia to the west of me, I hear Hunter Biden is going to be ambassador to Russia. I see that A-10s are flying low over North Judson. Relax and get used to it, only going to increase. It’s Joe and Blow flying over to see if you are wearing your mask. The military spends millions of dollars to fly over Silty Slough every year just to check on me. Helps to have friends and family in the military. Thanks everyone for paying your taxes so I can wave to the C-130 making a low pass over the slough to check if we are ok. I like seeing your tax dollars at work for me. Still no noise from the Trump hater crickets. They must be hiding under a rock like Joe. Kari and I are going to go out later to play some more in the snow. I made a couple trips down the ramp yesterday. I was surprised by the water that we call overflow for about 25 feet. It was just ice yesterday morning. Funny how millions of tons of snow press down on the icy river and cause the water to overflow. Could be science, global warming, another ice age age, who knows. I just know, stay out of the overflow and Walmart, either one has bad consequences. That reminds me. Did you know that Al Gore made his acceptance speech 37 days before Bush was declared the winner? Remember Yogi said “It’s not clean unless it is Oxyclean.” No that was somebody else…”It ain’t over til it’s over.” Like Gore’s case I hope it is, “Deja vu all over again” Did you see this guy that Joe is having advise on the Chinese virus says that 75 years is long enough to live. The plan is really coming together kill the babies and kill off the old people. It is their fix for Social Security. I just thought of another scam. Since I have a extra printers from the fake mayoral ballot operation, I can start printing fake documents to show you younger so the government doesn’t kill you at 75. More on the mayors race after the mail plane arrives tomorrow with the last of the votes. You can still contribute to the candidates just send a picture of the cash. Stay safe, warm, and healthy my friends.
Thank you Lord for the snow and a warm cabin to keep it off us.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
BTW orders are coming in fast for the “I Voted” Sharpies. Order soon before we run out. We still have a good supply of mail in ballots.
Tuesday November 10, 2020
The new mayor of Silty Slough Cooper Stephens.
The view from the outhouse Tuesday November 10 18 degrees at the Slough. The snow ended yesterday afternoon. It was still warm enough so the solar panels on the cabin roof shed and I got a whopping .4kw of free electricity. You are going to have to do better than that Joe if you are going to eliminate oil. Come on man… Oh, I forgot you don’t work for me, let’s keep it that way. I already have a President. Latest election news. It turns out the mail plane that delivers to Silty Slough is owned by Nancy Pelosi’s husband’s company. It figures since he makes millions leasing postal facilities to the government. Anyway they sent the mail in votes in an open cockpit bi-plane. The ballots I had mailed…I mean that were mailed in for Teddy got wet and are unreadable. I figured the used copy of the Hammer software I received would surely do the trick and we would still be ok. Teddy and I knew we could hide in the root cellar and not even have to campaign. We are going to win anyway, it is a given. Turns out the Hammer software is the original version and is still in Chinese. I just took a shot and checked some boxes and let the software do the voting, I mean the counting. The money train is on the way into the station. The vote totals stand now at Cooper 267,420 votes and Teddy minus 3. I’ll have to get this straightened out. Right now Cooper is claiming to be mayor elect and taking all the chewbies. Teddy and I are thinking of getting a judge from Westminster Kennel Club to throw the whole thing out and have a new election. I see that the vaccine is out. China just airfreighted a couple plane loads to Chile. They are cashing in right away because nobody in China has any money to spend on a vaccine. Why would you waist it there? Trump haters were complaining about no vaccine now complaining about here too early, which way do you want it. I guess you are used to having it both ways. Teddy and I are interested to see if Kamala is going to take hers orally or doggie style. Whatever that is. Something Teddy came up with.
Some of the Trump hater post are suggesting to come together. Where were you four years ago when your side lost? Will you feel the same if the election is reversed in the courts. I think not. The only thing I like about two faced people is they have the unique ability to kiss my arse with both faces. Another group of posters are wondering when Trump is going to leave the country. What a bunch of mental giants to come up with that. Ok my mind is back to the slough. Since Cooper is going to be 2 in a couple days Teddy is going to concede as a birthday present to him. Cooper is the new mayor of Silty Slough. I believe the money train has left the station without Teddy and I. I’m sure Cooper won’t hold a grudge, a good belly rub should get me a cushy job in the new administration. Ted and I are working on a book deal since that is what most politicians do when put out to pasture. Going to get Joe and Blow in with us. Teddy suggested “The Art of the Steal” for the title. If that doesn’t work out, Teddy and I are going into a new venture. “Slap a Snowflake” cards. Snowflakes are too stupid to slap, you just hand them the card. We could branch out, Karen’s, Trump Haters………send your suggestions. I will send your cash royalty by picture transfer system. I wish you well my friends.
Thank you Lord for watching over us.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Wednesday November 18, 2020
Silty Slough from above. Spruce Manor Asylum is under the blue dot.I love it when people post baby pictures on their teenagers birthdays. Cooper is 2 now so that’s 14 in people years. Happy birthday teenager.
The view from the outhouse. Wednesday November 18 Mr. Fahrenheit said it was 14 below zero when the boys woke me up to go out this morning. It’s about time to start wearing some pants. Sunrise will be in a few more minutes at 9:29. Sunset is at 4:12 that’s 6 hours and 43 minutes for old Sol to heat this ball up. He is hanging out pretty low in the sky so the rays arriving at a such a shallow angle don’t do much heating. Yesterday the temp was -13 and warmed up to a high of -1. In 33 more days the days will start getting longer, same everywhere, but I guess you people of science already knew that. Living at 62 degrees north latitude the swings from the shortest day to the longest are lot greater. On farther north a bit it doesn’t even get daylight for several weeks. The big adventure yesterday was a trip to the post office with Roger. First time on the river for me this early in the season. Usually Kari and I don’t come out from town until after Christmas. The trail was good, it is to early for Roger to have it marked, a lot of the route is on the many sand bars along with crossing the main channel a couple times. There were a few spots of open water that were easy to spot from the fog rising from them. A couple spots had overflow that was a little mushy, but short, shallow, and not a problem. It is amazing that the water is not frozen when it is below zero. Some of you self appointed environmental scientists need to educate me on this or hook me up with your buddy Al Gore. We picked up about 60 packages for the neighbors at Fish Lakes Creek area, everything you can think of from dog food to repair parts. I don’t know what everyone did before Amazon Prime. The only mail we had in our small condo #45 that we rent at the post office was election propaganda. We headed back down the river toward home. I feel fairly safe on the ice although one spot where we cross the mouth of the Skwentna River onto the Yentna I think about. In the summer I look at the depth finder on the boat and it is 30 feet deep there. Roger and I split up in Silty Slough and I rode up the ramp to the cabin. The mayor and his sidekick were excited to see me, it was like I’d been gone a week. Cooper turned 2 on Monday and he had me ask Kari to bake him a white cake with white frosting. I’m glad that’s my favorite too. The next big project is marking and packing a runway and getting the Silty Slough Airport open for ski planes. I don’t want to miss out on any federal funding or huge landing fees the new mayor is charging. I’m also starting a material list of everything we need to haul up here on our freight sleds. In addition to the normal gas, diesel, propane, dog food, kitty litter, and anything else that is heavy to last us until Jan 2022, I need 50 sheets of 1 1/8 inch plywood decking, metal for the roof, a septic tank and all the pipe for plumbing, windows, doors, and, and, and the list goes on and on. Good thing I was a freightdog in a previous life. It’s time to get up and have another piece of Cooper’s birthday cake. I wonder what kind Teddy likes? I’ll bet I can guess by January. Stay safe and healthy my friends!
Thank you Lord for watching over us.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Thursday November 19, 2020
The view from the outhouse.
Hello from Silty Slough. Thursday morning was a little cold -15, I don’t think it ever made it to zero all day. Friday was pretty good. Kari tried out her automatic washer for about 5 loads. The generator ran most of the day to power the electric dryer. I turned the heater off in the generator shed for the day because while the generator is running the heater just runs wide open, since the generator is sucking air from the outside through the outhouse. I figured out a control relay that will interrupt the thermostat circuit so the heater won’t run while the generator is running. That should save a little propane every day. We aren’t getting any solar power right now so the generator runs at least twice a day for an hour or so. Sometimes more depending on our electric useage. We need to closely monitor the fuel supply because that is what keeps us warm and the lights on. At Wolf Lake I can go months without going in the boiler room and not even think about it. Out here since we are not connected to the pipe and the wire, I pay a little more attention. I got on Amazon and found a fuel counter system. You just put a counter on your tanks and it reads out your quantities on your smartphone. Now I don’t have to go out in my underwear when it is 15 below to check. Today I looked and I have 6700 gallons of diesel, 2700 gallons of gas, and 22,000 pounds of propane. We are good for the rest of my life. If you are interested this gadget for your system just look for Dominion Counting Systems on Amazon. I don’t know where all this fuel is coming from, maybe the system took some from the neighbors. Teddy and I are going to get a dealership since we were cheated out of the mayoral election. We are also working on a system to take a few bucks out of every Trump Haters bank account and transfer it to Teddy’s account. I’ll keep you posted in case you are interested. The good Lord covered us with a blanket of clouds overnight so it really warmed up. I think it was about 25 today. Keeps this up it will be bad for ice fishing. A few snow machines have been going by. The boys have been going nuts barking at them. Mayor Cooper wants to charge a toll now for going through the slough. The river isn’t good enough to haul any heavy freight loads yet. If anyone is interested when it gets good I have a couple extra snow machines and sleds. I can guarantee it will be an adventure. March is a good time. My cargo trailer made it to Indiana just about 1 year after I ordered it. Lots of roadblocks were in the way getting it picked up, heart surgery, the Chinese virus, weather, etc. Now I just need to be able to get through Canada to get the things I need from down south for the addition at Spruce Manor. I was hoping for May or June but it looks like everything is going the wrong way now. In case I don’t get a chance to post before Thursday, everyone have a happy Thanksgiving. As bad as everything seems we still have a lot to be thankful for. Stay safe and healthy my friends!
The view from the outhouse. Sunday October 25th I’ve been working my proverbial tail off ever since Roger dropped me on the island the 13th. 12 days down and 11 to go until Kari gets here. We will know more about that tomorrow when she gets the rest of her staples out. She could have gotten them out last week but since she is bending her knee over 100 degrees in pt the doctor wanted to leave half in another week. It would set the program back if she split the incision open and her new kneecap fell out in the floor. My first major task when I arrived was to sort out and put away the two boat loads of supplies that Roger had hauled up previously. I spread it out but I would say it took a full day or more. Next task was to pull wires through about 100 feet of conduit to the well. The conduit has been in for several years in anticipation of the well. It’s pretty simple with 2 people, but with just me it was harder than it needed to be. First I couldn’t get the fish tape to go the last few feet from either end. After several tries from each end, it is time for plan B. Bring out the shop vac and hook the hose to one end of the conduit, tie a small piece of cloth to a pull string, feed it into the other end of the conduit, and well-a, success. Now it is simple if one person pulls on the string and another person feeds the 4 wires I need. My dogs are really smart but I can’t for the life of me get them to feed the wire while I pull on the string. What would MacGyver do? Picture this in your mind. The conduit at the well is pointing straight up so I put a 90 degree bend on it and tied another piece of string onto the pull string to reach back to the other end of the conduit. I’m feeding wire with one hand and pulling the string with the other hand and pretty soon the wires appeared at the well. No help from the dogs, they were busy chasing every eagle or airplane that flew over. I hooked everything up and back filled the hole just before the rain started. I’ll hook up the pressure tank in the root cellar and connect the water lines and pressure switch inside the cabin tomorrow. Same basic story installing a thermostat and propane bottles for heating the generator shed. Same actor just different props. Everything takes longer in the bush. I spent one day cleaning up down by Al’s cabin. Roger and I talked about milling more logs for Spruce Manor and he was just getting ready to come over when the chunks of ice started floating down the river. (Picture attached). This doesn’t work well with a jet boat. Ice has been chasing me around for most of my life in boats, planes, cars, trucks, and trailers. You should see a snow machine on ice. Completely out of control, that’s why they aren’t called ice machines. I did a few other deeds that I can’t recall right now to keep busy if anyone is doing an analysis of my productivity. Cooking, vacuuming, and dish washing take up a bit of time. I take the dogs on a run almost every day. No I don’t run, they run, I ride the 4 wheeler. Like they say, if you see me running shoot whatever it is chasing me. I spent part of one day talking to my financial advisor. I can’t believe the Joe and Blow supporters aren’t worried about their pensions and 401k. We came up with a plan, I wanted to go to all cash until the election gets sorted out. But it’s like flying an airplane, driving a car, running a boat, gentle corrections. Not the zig zag pattern as if someone is shooting at you. So we decided to move to bonds and cash along with stocks of companies that make necessities… liquor, medicine, and soap. The plan is when Trump wins we are going into stocks of companies that make plywood and tear gas for all the peaceful protests. If the Democrats manage to steal the election we are going to go into all Chinese stocks and Russian natural gas and oil. I watched the debate the other night. I am very concerned about not having diesel for my generator Did you know propane is LPG liquified petroleum gas? Coal and natural gas are fossil fuels. How are you going to heat your house? I have solar here at my cabin for part of the electricity. That’s solar as in sun. When the sun don’t shine you don’t make any electricity. Oh, get a bunch of batteries either lead acid or lithium, I’m bad that’s mining and they are expensive. The average homeowner won’t have enough money left after Joe’s tax increases to buy enough batteries to run a flash light. How are you going to power your house for a couple days when it is overcast? Truth is we need solar, wind, fossil fuels, and nuclear, all used in balance and properly. Jan 1 I’m applying for a government grant to run a line 60 miles to connect the Silty Slough Electric Co-Op to the grid. I’m thinking about $18 mil, should be a little in there to skim some off to make up what Joe Inc steals from my pension and 401k. If you can’t beat the crooked politicians you need to imitate them. It’s the only way to win at their game. Back to the outhouse…. I really didn’t mean that. I insulated the generator shed that is attached to the outhouse. Yesterday I cut a couple heat vents so now the outhouse is heated. I can’t tell a big difference since the thermostat is only set at 40 degrees. The high was 36 today. Should feel good when it is 20 below outside. Just as long as Joe leaves me enough propane and diesel. I guess I can always switch to wood. I don’t know what you people in the cities and towns are going to do once Joe’s economy goes to pieces. We can survive out here in the bush. I worry about you. I guess it won’t be Joe’s economy anyway. Peter from South Bend said it was still Obama’s economy that Trump had nothing to do with it. So I guess Joe gets Obama’s economy. I got off course a little bit, back to the magenta line. That’s airplane lingo. It warmed up today, rain and snow. No ice chunks in the river for now, but later this week the overnight low is forecast to be 3 degrees. Shouldn’t be too long until we make the switch from four wheelers to snow machines. I type all this on my cell phone and get very few negative comments. I’m disappointed.
Trump haters either: 1 Don’t get it… may be going over their heads. 2 Think I’m a loony tune 3 Don’t care 4 Have their mind already made up and don’t want to be confused by the facts Maybe I need to take a poll. Vote 1-4 You won’t hurt my feelings. If I don’t like the results, I’ll just manipulate the data. Data, oh shoot, I left my laptop at a repair place. Can anyone send me a picture of $85 cash so I can pick it up? I’m late for cocktail hour. Believe it or not I haven’t been drinking, yet today.
Thank you Lord for a rainy cold day!!…it certainly beats the alternative.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!
Wednesday October 28, 2020
The view from the outhouse. Wednesday October 28 Cooper woke me up about 6 this morning. I almost said 6am this morning. Notice how people do that. I go to the ATM machine, too. He usually sleeps longer. I went downstairs in my bare feet to let the boys out. I could tell that it was a bit nippy when I stepped from the heated concrete floor of the entryway onto the concrete in my bare feet. The thermometer said 17 degrees. I bribed the boys to come back in rather quickly by offering a chewbie. In a little over 3 hours it will be sunrise at 930. 8 hours and 38 minutes later it will be sunset. The generator is running. I did not expect it to start until this evening. It is clear skies and I should have been able to make all the solar power I use and recharge the batteries to carry me through the day into evening. This should work for the next week of sunny days then it will be back to mostly generator power until March. I plan for it to run a couple hours a day except on days we do laundry it will have to run more because we have an electric dryer. Anyway I will turn the generator off today without fully charging the batteries and let the sun do the job a little later. The boys and I went back to bed. There isn’t much we can or want to do until daylight. I woke up again about 10am in the morning….The boys wanted to go out and patrol the area. No killer ermines, coyotes, or moose I hope. We sure don’t need any coyotes up here dropping off a kid. There isn’t enough room as it is. I wanted to take a picture of the river but wasn’t dressed yet. So what, there isn’t anyone within a mile or two to the east and it is my guess there is no one north between me and the North Pole. It was chilly but refreshing. I did put on slippers to walk on the crunchy snow. I took a picture of my lower leg and slipper just to prove it. It wouldn’t be appropriate to take a full selfie and post it. I may be considered a pre-vert like some of the Bidens. But I guess a picture or email on a computer doesn’t prove anything anymore. I did have underwear and a tee shirt on, this time. The river has been clear for a couple days. No ice, but today with the low overnight temps it is back. It should increase all week with the low temps at night. Back inside I found out why the generator ran. I left a couple battery chargers plugged in. My fault. When I’m elected mayor of Silty Slough, I’m going to get some subordinates so that I can cash in on this “plausible deniability”. Seems like a handy tool. I don’t remember what I did Monday. Maybe I hung out in the basement. I don’t have a basement. I guess maybe I hung out in the root cellar. Anyway I didn’t see a soul, kept a lid on it. Yesterday I ran water lines to the faucets and connected Kari’s new automatic washer. It was easier than it should be. Not often I say that. I tried it out with a couple loads of laundry. With all the dials and settings it is a college level course just to operate it. That was harder than it needed to be. With all this modernization it is too easy to do things. The well, on demand hot water heater, automatic washer, clothes dryer, heated outhouse just makes it too easy to use too much energy. We really thought about things when we hauled water. No, I’m not ready to give up my new well, but everyone else should unhook theirs and go back to a hand pump if they truly want to solve the energy problems. That is as green as you can get.
Thank you Lord for sunny days!
I’ll be in touch
Blue skies!!!
Thursday October 29, 2020
Silty Slough’s latest filing for mayoral election. For remote deposit only.
The view from the outhouse. Thursday October 29 Hello everyone. I decided to give it a break today. I won’t be talking about Hunter’s laptop, and the low attendance at the Biden rallies, and I voted stickers among other subjects. As many of you know I am running for the mayor of Silty Slough. I really need to get into a political office so I can make some real money to be able to complete Spruce Manor. If you read the comments on yesterday’s view, you will know that my dog Cooper is going to run against me. I have been trying to think of ways to discredit him, but I can’t come up with anything. He is loyal, loving, obedient, good looking, and on and on. Actually he has better character than most of the candidates running for the national offices. I know for a fact he is smarter than AOC. He doesn’t spend any time golfing, but does like to play catch with his ball. I guess the only reason not to vote for him would be because you don’t like him. But most everyone I know likes him. I know, we need yet another poll. Mayor Don or Mayor Cooper? Maybe we could have campaign rallies. No, he would go round up his pet chickens (spruce hens), ermines, a couple coyotes(4 legged variety), a couple black bears, a squirrel, and a moose or two. I would really be upstaged if he had a couple eagles fly over. Bad idea, I think I should just hide in the root cellar until after the election. Now to the lighter side. In the past when it gets cold we put an electric heater in the outhouse. Ok, I know this is going by the way in the green new deal. Since heaters don’t play well with solar, the heater is plugged into an outlet that is only powered when the generator is running. It was very nice to time your trips about 45 minutes after the generator started. Frost is melted off the seat, life is good. You could even stand to do a word puzzle or a sudoku at -10 outside. In a previous view I talked about getting the generator shed heater going and thermostat set at 40 degrees. I have a mechanical louvre for the radiator exhaust. I decided that I wouldn’t need an intake louvre. I didn’t want to waste propane heating the outdoors so I insulated everything and sealed up most of the holes. The generator can still get cooling air around the exhaust pipe from the Perkins Diesel engine. Saving propane, keeping warm, engine starts easy at 40 degrees. Life is good again. For my next project I cut two vents from the generator shed through the wall to the attached outhouse so the heater would keep it warm. I made one high and one low. The outhouse is really sealed up and insulated so it won’t take too much to heat it. We don’t need the electric heater anymore and have a warm outhouse 24/7. So it seems. This morning sunrise was 9:32. The boys let me lay around until 10:00 to go out. It is 14 degrees, I’m in my underwear and slippers again. Life is still good, I have a heated outhouse. I went inside, lifted the lid, got my sudoku, very comfortable. The trusty autostart system for the generator sensed the need to charge the batteries. I heard the diesel cranking, wow what a system I have built. Things are finally coming together. The generator starts and a rush of 14 degree air comes in the 4” vent pipes into the toilet hole, up between my legs at about 30 miles an hour, through the vents, past the generator fan through the radiator and out the exhaust louvre. What a rush. I haven’t looked up the wind chill at 14 degrees and 30 miles an hour but I can attest that it is considerable. After I’m elected mayor I’m going to appoint a commission to study the problem and select an engineering firm to redesign the system. We will have to hire a construction management company to hire contractors and oversee the work. We will have to have a third party inspector to be sure the work is performed properly. This should take a couple years. I could just cut an inlet louvre in the generator shed or just use the outhouse when the generator isn’t running, but the mayor wouldn’t be able to get any kickbacks. I plan to hire a grant writer to get about $700k for the project, but then we will need two more outhouses to comply with the Democrats gender neutral policy, so that cost could triple. More chunks of ice in the river. I’m going to keep a lid on it and stay in the bunker today.
Stay warm, safe, and healthy my friends. Avoid the Chinese virus, the Spanish flu, the German measles, and Walmart at all cost.
Thank you Lord for another sunny day.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
By the way BobbyRay Howard I attached a picture of the money I owe you for the campaign. Just forward it on to your bank.
Friday October 30, 2020
Silty Slough Airport looking West. Silty Slough Airport looking EastSilty Slough Log and Milling Company is put to bed for the winter.
The view from the outhouse Friday October 30 It was cool this morning 9 degrees. Lots of ice in the river as the video shows. I waited until the batteries were charged this morning to go to the outhouse. You will know what I mean if you read yesterday’s view. I’m finally thawed out. Some people say unthawed, but wouldn’t that be frozen? FB puts a message on every other post about how to figure out a method to cast my ballot. We usually vote early, this year we planned to be at the cabin. Early in person voting started October 19th. We planned on being at the cabin before then so we requested a 45 day advance ballot by mail to be sent to our small condo #45 at the Skwentna Post Office. It arrived from Anchorage by mail plane at the Skwentna Airport. The postmaster met the plane and took it across the river to the office by boat. Kari’s knee surgery changed the schedule for our being at the cabin. Our friend and neighbor Roger Phillips went 7 miles to the post office by boat and picked up our mail. Our neighbor Craig Emery flew the dogs and I out to Bentalit airstrip. Roger brought the ballot a couple miles on his side by side to meet us. I voted and Craig flew the ballot back to Kari. She drove our ballots to the post office and mailed them to Fairbanks to be counted. If I can vote anyone should be able to vote, on time. It is called planning ahead. Election Day is November 10. A Federal Judge doesn’t need to extend it or give you extra time to vote. If you are in the military overseas that is a different story, you should have different rules for casting your ballot, since you are serving our country. No argument about that. The only draw back to my early voting is, I didn’t get an “I voted” sticker. I know I voted. I see people whining on FB they didn’t get a sticker, is this the biggest thing in their life. So high school. I guess everyone needs a participation trophy. Where are you going to wear it anyway the Walmart? Cooper brought in a dead squirrel today to vote here in the local mayoral election. If that isn’t bad enough he tried to get a couple of his toy squirrels and a toy duck to be able to vote for him. I sure hope he isn’t turning Democrat on me. I don’t know how I could explain it to my friends. I rather he would be gay. Are dogs gay? I brought 6 big bags of candy out for Halloween. I’m not planning on any trick or treaters so I have eaten most of it. That’s what Halloween is for anyway, isn’t it? I woke up early this morning and looked up at Kari’s black bear rug that is on the ceiling. In the dark it looked just like the “Grimm Reaper”. I normally wouldn’t think of the Grimm Reaper but the night before Kari’s knee surgery Teddy woke Kari up growling. She said she looked over and right there was the Reaper. She said it was ok though cause he was on my side of the bed. The boys and I went down across the island and checked the ice in the river. It won’t be long. I’m a little concerned that the ice may jamb up and raise the river enough to flow through Silty Slough and flood the airstrip. That would be a problem. If the plane can’t land the only way Kari can get here until probably sometime in December is by helicopter. Wouldn’t be so bad but she is bringing ice cream. Life is good in Silty Slough. I’ve never been completely by my self for this long. The boys are good company, we have some great conversations. Once in a while someone will text or call. I talk to Kari several times a day. The closest neighbor is about a mile or so down the river. There is no trail so right now no way to get there. Come to think of it though, me, the two dogs, two cats, and any other creatures Cooper drags in to vote, have as many in attendance as a Biden rally. I’ve been eating good not well. There is a difference. I’ve had steak, pork chops, eggs, Caesar salad, BLTs minus the T, hot dogs, grilled cheese, potatoes, a couple apples, cottage cheese, and a little bit of Halloween candy. I’m out of lettuce, tomatoes, and fresh eggs. I saw a good recipe for tomato soup today. I may have that tonight. Tomatoe juice, salt, celery, hot sauce, Worcestershire sauce, pepper, vodka. I think I will serve it over ice like Vichyssoise. Everyone stay safe and healthy!! Avoid Walmart at all cost. You might as well write a check and send it directly to China.
Thank you Lord for watching over us.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Saturday October 31, 2020
Teddy Bear Stephens candidate for mayor of Silty Slough. The mayoral candidates having a debate.
The view from the outhouse Saturday October 31 The boys and I woke up to 7 degrees this morning at Silty Slough. There are some big happenings in the race for mayor. Earlier I suppressed the news that our dog Teddy Bear… Cooper’s nephew lost in the primary election. Overnight the polls have turned on me and there is a good chance that Cooper may win and derail my money train. I have come up with another plan. Teddy is going to run as a write in candidate. That’s what Alaskans do when they loose in their party’s primary. This will be simple, Teddy Bear is a lot easier to spell than Lisa Murkowsky. I will be withdrawing and joining Teddy on the ticket as vice-mayor. I am very qualified because I have a lot of vices. Teddy is very electable, he is a luv. He would be a very good politician, he barks a lot without knowing what he is barking about. Teddy doesn’t like to get his paws wet or dirty and he stays inside the bunker with me when it is cold or rainy. He has absolutely no interest in politics, so within a month after the election he will resign and I will be in complete control of the swamp..I mean the slough. Forgot what I was saying for a second or two. The money train will be back on the tracks in no time. Teddies only interest is food. He eats everything. I guess eats is a loose term. He swallows everything without even tasting it. Like a politician the little guy will take your hand off to get even a tiny morsel. Cooper is much more refined. He is gentle and chews his food. He does burp out loud however without saying excuse me. Even though Teddy eats everything in sight he stays fit, slim, and trim. My next scam may be a weight loss plan that includes duck wrapped apple slices and copious amounts of cat shit. Didn’t Opra have some sort of scam like that? I was trying to come up with a campaign slogan for Ted and I. I don’t think I want to use Ted or Teddy, that could link us to the Kennedys. The only thing I can come up with on short notice is…Dumb and Dumber but that would insult Teddy. Maybe Too Smart and Not Too Smart. Please send in your suggestions. We will have another poll. I think I just figured out where the term Joe Blow came from, no that originated way before them. I hear from folks that they aren’t going to vote for Trump because they “just don’t like him” or Trump is going to “take away Social Security”. I don’t know about you but I’ve been getting a raise every year. Don’t vote away your paycheck, your pension, or maybe even your job just because you don’t like the guy. You can’t help your family or anybody else very much with less money. This isn’t a vote for Homecoming King. If Joe is elected Kamala will be president within months. Those wheels are already in motion. I ask you when you go to church tomorrow are you thinking about voting for the party that advocates killing unborn babies on Tuesday? Is Kamala the role model you want for your daughters and granddaughters?
I wish you health and safety my friends.
Thank you Lord for your many blessings.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Monday November 2, 2020
The view from the outhouse Monday November 2 I went outside about 9 this morning. One of the mayoral candidates needed to go to the bathroom. It was 10 degrees and the wind was blowing about 15 mph out of the north. Still in my underwear and slippers I stood and looked at the river a few minutes trying to decide if the current has slowed down. I’m trying to toughen up for the hard times that may be coming. Today I have made one lap around the sun since I had heart surgery. I’m thankful that I’m still here. I feel great and am way stronger than a year ago. Those arm curls at 5pm are shaping me up. They also sharpen me up. I get a lot smarter. Just ask Teddy. It was posted that the ice has stopped moving 8 miles downriver and again about 16 miles down from here. It shouldn’t be much longer before it stops here. We need some colder temperatures and snow before we can safely ride our snow machines on the river to get back to town. First trip will probably be 5 miles upriver to the post office, probably shortly after Thanksgiving. The next trip will be over to the other side of the river to one of the lodges for a Christmas party. In January it will be time to start freighting building material out here for the summer. We will also haul diesel, propane, and gas to last us until next January. Kari will have a long list of groceries and supplies to restock the pantry shelves. Now is a slow time at Silty Slough. As soon as we get a little more snow we can ride the trails around the property and on the state land. 2 or 3 miles of trails in all and they end up back at the cabin. Kari called and said she is flying out tomorrow instead of Wednesday, wind and weather permitting. I had planned on cleaning the place up tomorrow but I guess I’ll get with it today. Why do it early and just have to do it again. She is sharing a ride with Myra so they will be stopping at Bentalit strip to drop her off. Then they will fly 2 miles farther west and drop Kari off at Silty Slough. I can still drive the 4 wheeler and wagon down to meet the plane and haul everything back to the cabin. I only have 4 or 5 small projects left on my to do list. Kari is bringing some parts I need. I will knock those out at my leisure. Teddy and Cooper the two Silty Slough candidates for mayor are outside rolling in the snow having yet another debate. Quite a tussle. Cooper outweighs Teddy by 12-14 pounds but Ted is tough and holds his own. The next time I’m close to a tape measure I need to measure Cooper’s height at the shoulder. If he is over 18” he will loose his mini status and will no longer be a “Mini Cooper”. Cooper’s dad Remy was best of breed the first year Mini American Shepherds were recognized at Wimbledon…. no Westminster, different election…lost my head a minute. Remy is also Teddy’s grandfather. That makes Cooper Teddy’s uncle. Man do we have the nepotism here in Silty Slough politics. Well tomorrow is the big day. If Trump wins please all you Trump haters don’t defriend me. How would I be able to poke sticks in your cages. If Blow wins I’ve been thinking where I would like to live. I don’t like the food in Canada, Germany seems to be screwed up, Australia has to many creatures that can kill you, Japan may be ok.. they are used to wearing masks already and I like sushi. Too much of Hollywood has already moved to Greece, so it will be ruined in no time. Maybe I can move to a socialist country, crack the code, then move back and take advantage of all the fools that started this. Right now I’m stuck right here in Silty Slough. There are a lot worse places I can name. I could use a big screen TV for movies in the addition in case any of you come up with any extra from the riots and looting. I can send a picture of the cash. How ever much you want. Stay safe and healthy my friends.
Thank you Lord for another lap.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Wednesday November 4, 2020
The view from the outhouse Wednesday November 4 3 below zero at Silty Slough this morning,skies are blue, and the wind is calm. I must say it didn’t take too long to shake the dew off the lilly, if you know what I mean. The boys didn’t stay out long either, didn’t even have to bribe them with a chewbie to come back inside. Yesterday after I figured out the airport wasn’t going to be flooded by an ice jamb on the river I had about 48 minutes to get the cabin cleaned up before Kari is scheduled to arrive. Dishes to do, bed to make, vacuum up the pet hair, take out the trash. It was very stressful. The boys started helping me with the dishes, they washed and I dried. I hurriedly made the bed, not a sterling job but good enough. Kari texted that they are airborne, early of course. I’m really in a hurry now, vacuum is plugged with hair, that takes precious extra minutes to clean out. I get it going, sheet is hanging off my bed. It gets caught in the power head and rips the covers off the bed. Reminds me the time I got a garden hose in the snow blower and the time I got a garden hose in the bush hog. Giant weed eater, huge. The dogs don’t like the vacuum so they were on the bed which is a brand new air mattress. With everything flying around the cats get scared and jump on the bed too. The dogs didn’t like the cats on their bed so all 4 roll up in a ball. With the weather we haven’t been spending much time outside so all of our claws are long. You guessed it they poke a hole in the air mattress. In all the commotion, I forgot the sink running. It is running over the counter and down the stairway. I’m glad we have a well, otherwise I would have been pissed about wasting water that we had to haul. I threw the vacuum and the covers in the closet. Folded up the air mattress since it was deflated now anyway and managed to mop up the water and get down to the slough just as the plane was landing. Kari had a pretty good jag of stuff but we managed to get it up to the cabin in one trailer load. She is getting around good with her new knee. When we got everything unloaded she managed to make it upstairs to inspect everything. Her only comment was, “You left your iced tea glass on the counter”. Other than that not much happened at Silty Slough on Tuesday. Welcome home Kari. Stay safe and healthy, my friends.
The View from the Outhouse 