The view from the outhouse.
Tuesday November 24
Hello from Silty Slough. Clear skies and 10 degrees on the plus side of zero. I’m going through a lot of chewbies to lure the dogs back inside when they go out. They have a fur coat and I don’t so I can’t just hang around outside while they make their rounds. I also award myself a couple of leftover Halloween chewbies every time they go out. Two trips up and down the stairs should zero me out. The trips are a bit more difficult now. A couple days ago I woke up with a sore right foot. Wasn’t too bad during the day but at night I couldn’t get the dull ache to stop.
Last night Kari decided to try making French food. I’m thinking I really like fries. No this is French braised short ribs. When I went to Costco several months ago I bought the wrong kind of ribs. So the cook is making do. Now thanks to management I have the AnyList app on my phone. It’s a great shopping list. You can sort it lots of ways. I like to sort by store. It even shows a picture of the exact item I’m supposed to buy. I’m not saying management is picky but if our bed had a sleep number hers would have to be set accurate to 3 decimal places. AnyList is getting me ready for the new government control. Management can watch on her phone as I shop, add things, take away things, wonder why I’m not shopping fast enough, etc. She can also look at the bank app to see if I spent any extra money on chewbies for me and the boys. Get used to it folks. It is coming to a local very close to you. I hear Gates and company want to chip everyone. I think the boys can get it out of my arm in no time. You should see what they do to a $15 squeaky toy.
Anyway back to dinner. (French)Short ribs over mashed potatoes, home made bread, and a pumpkin dessert. Absolutely awesome. I could see the Eiffel Tower from the outhouse window. I never did see any fries.
Now Kari takes off the chef hat and puts on her doctor hat, not really a hat but an LED headlampto take a look at my sore foot. I’ll share my theory someday about how lightbulbs don’t make light but suck darkness instead. Later.
The doc gets me on the operating sofa and turns this headlamp on that is as bright as the sun, just to shine in my eyes so I can’t see what is going on. She pokes a big needle along side of the nail on my big toe. Just checking to see if it is infected again like before. Blake Sheldon popped into my head “He stuck that needle down deep in my gum.” Then we soak my foot in boiling water and epsom salt. No infection only blood. Now doc gets on the internet to consult with a specialist named Bubba. They deduce with the accuracy of a political poll that it may be gout. Now I don’t want it to be gout because I associate that with old age. I guess we are going to treat for gout. Doc makes up this concoction of apple cider vinegar, turmeric, lemon juice, swamp water, a few drops of used diesel oil, a ravens eye, and I don’t know what else. She handed it to me with a bottle of water for a chaser and said to drink it down. The ravens eye was looking right at me. It wasn’t bad, it was really really really bad. The door and windows are frozen shut upstairs, so I can’t spit it out on the deck, my foot hurts too bad to run downstairs and out the door, so I swallowed it. Bubbas instructions were to take 2 Advil, elevate and ice my foot, and read more on the internet in the morning. Didn’t we just boil my foot? Now we are icing it. What are we doing getting it ready for home canning?
I woke up at 4:45 this morning trying to be quiet and not wake the doc up, I can’t take a second dose of Bubba’s medicine. I went downstairs as fast as I could quietly and barely made it to the outhouse. Bubbas medicine sure cleans you out. My foot actually feels pretty good. When I came back in the chef hat is baking blueberry muffins, the doc hat is brewing ginger and lemon tea. Let me tell you ginger tea doesn’t taste anything like ginger bread or ginger snaps. The muffins were really good though. I think I like the chef hat better.
Doc asks how my foot is and I let her know that it is way better. She said she was doing more reading on the internet and Bubba said that if you did nothing it would go away within 12-24 hours. Go figure. How do we know if it was a successful treatment or if it just went away by itself? I guess a lot of things are like that.
The tea and muffins made me sleepy so I laid back down for another nap until 10:30.
I may try to milk this foot thing a while longer. Teddy and Cooper think a batch of snickerdoodles may help.
So that folks is how it is, another shitty day in the paradise of the life in the bush.
Stay safe and healthy my friends.
Thank you Lord for modern medicine.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Thursday November 26, 2020
The view from the outhouse
Thursday November 26
HAPPY THANKSGIVING from Silty Slough!!
12 degrees this morning, it snowed 3 or 4 inches overnight and made everything clean and pretty for the holiday. Sunrise is in another hour at 9:47 and will hide again for the evening at 3:56. 6 hours and 9 minutes of daylight, the rows are definitely getting shorter now. Snow is forecast again for this evening. Kari baked pumpkin pies yesterday and I cleared the snow off the deck. I think I can milk this sore foot one more day. The boys are still holding out for Snickerdoodles. This afternoon while all of you are having your follow up meal we are going to actually ride over the river and through the woods on our snow machines to our neighbors to celebrate Thanksgiving. Our clocks are 3-4 hours behind most of you. When I wake up and see BobbyRay Howard’s beautiful sunrise photos he is getting ready for lunch. Then not too long after I have lunch he is posting sunset photos. I have the time zone concept pretty well covered. It took me quite a while to grasp crossing the international date line when I started flying across the Pacific Ocean. How can I fly 7 hours west and be into tomorrow 19 hours ahead of home in Alaska. Once when I was in London I went to the Royal Observatory in Greenwich and stood on the zero longitude line where time is referenced to. Greenwich Mean Time, GMT, or Zulu was what my working life was based on for 37 years. It still didn’t help with the International Date Line, that’s half way around the world from Greenwich and very hard to stand on. Aren’t you very sorry that you asked me what time it is?
One more short tale and I will leave you alone. I may have told this I can’t remember, if I already have I’m counting on you not remembering it either. In a previous life I was flying a charter trip for the military. We deadheaded to Bucharest, Romania and took a van to Constanta to pick up our 747 in a couple days. It was the day before Thanksgiving but they don’t know about Thanksgiving here, at least it seems. We stayed in a nice resort on the Black Sea but it was off season and we were the only ones there. Some of the crew wanted to go shopping and we got the van to take us to the mall. I was looking for a Starbucks to get mug for my collection of everywhere I’d been in the 747-400. Every store in the mall had a sign in the window advertising “Black Friday Sale” Now they don’t do Thanksgiving but they are all in for Black Friday. Amazing the power of the internet and the quest for the almighty dollar.
I know this has been a rough year for many people. I worry for those that don’t have enough of what they need. Everyone can still look around and find much to be thankful for. We need to be thankful for those that can’t be with us, those that we miss, and those that have been taken from us. Our comfort in this is they are waiting for us in heaven.
I’m sure these storms of life will eventually end. Then there will be other storms to test us and shape us into who we are.
I wish all of you good health and safety, my friends. Have a Very Happy Thanksgiving!!
Thank you Lord for your many blessings!!
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Sunday November 29, 2020
Good morning from Silty Slough. 21 degrees at 6:45. It will be daylight at 9:55 and the sun will hide again at 3:51. We have slipped 4 minutes below 6 hours of daylight. Only 23 more days and the losses will turn back positive. I’ve heard promises like this in the past from my financial advisor. The length of the days increasing is a pretty sure thing unless the Democrats can find a way to screw that up to blame it on Trump. There was only about an inch of new snow overnight unlike Thursday night when it snowed another 15 inches. A lot of good it did to clear 4” off the deck on Wednesday. I told management that I could just wait, but she wouldn’t listen.
I see from posts that there are paper shortages again. Makes sense the hoarders have used up the 6 month supply they scarfed up in April. I don’t know about your household but we go to the outhouse about the same frequency day after day, week after week, year after year. We use about the same amount of paper each time. Why is there a shortage? Maybe being locked up our arses have gotten fatter and we have to use more paper. Due to the lockdowns maybe you don’t go to the neighbors and poop. I don’t know. I saw a post where this tribe of Trump haters were complaining about the shortage. One said she got hers last week and now she has tons. Duh aren’t people like you the problem? Now the rest of the tribe can’t find any. Then they send each other on a scavenger hunt for a roll of toilet paper. They had a roll at Dollar General 15 minutes ago, the truck delivers at Kroger at 6am, Costco has it but they have a limit1(isn’t that terrible to limit me?), just go to the neighborsand poop. I wanted to make a reply, but you are not allowed to disagree on their wall.
If we run short of toilet paper here at the asylum I have an emergency plan. We have a pump sprayer that Kari uses for bear baiting. I am going to modify the nozzle and mount it to the seat in the outhouse. A hand operated bidet in the wilderness. I just have to work out a few problems with the fluid freezing. Maybe I can add some salt or alcohol. I’ll get the cook to test it out. Another bonus the bear bait leaves a sweet cherry smell.
This morning the cook was baking something for breakfast. I asked what. She said stones. Now I know it is bad when Teddy eats rocks so I made some toast. Then she comes out with this beautiful pan of scones. I guess my hearing aids weren’t warm and up to speed yet. Too many years listing to the wind noise in the 747.
Since we are almost out of leftovers Kari is cooking a turkey today. We aren’t going to eat it today, just going to put it in the refrigerator and pick away at it for the next week. I hope she makes some left over dressing and sweet potatoes to go with it.
Friday was a normal day in the bush. We decided to pack the 15” of new snow before the next wave gets here. Kari and I suited up, warmed up the machines, and headed through the woods packing and widening the trail. I ventured down the ramp into the slough. The snow was piling up in front of my machine and I was a snow plow instead of a snow machine. I got off the previously packed trail into 3 feet of soft snow with a heavy machine. 20 minutes or so of tromping around the machine and packing a path and I was out. Back at the cabin we packed most of the yard. I shoveled the entryway to the root cellar. We decided to hook up to the freight sleds to move them around and get them on top of the snow. About 2 hours of digging, pulling, jerking, hooking, unhooking, and hooking 2 machines together, we had the sleds gliding on top of the snow with the boys riding on the decks. This was one of the days I wanted to call the airplane to come and get us. Where would we go? Back to uncivilization, no toilet paper, empty pantry and freezers, and the Chinese virus lurking at every corner, I don’t think so. The bad days out here are still better than anywhere else. The dogs are so much happier out here. When we go back to Wolf Lake they get depressed in a very short time. I’ve seen dogs in New York City that have never been off a leash outside. You bleeding hearts that are looking for a cause need to jump right on that.
Saturday was a great day. We went over to our neighbors for a visit. Nice ride on the frozen river. We can home and rode all the trails again to firm them up. Just a fun day. Cancel the airplane I’m staying. We have to anyway, the boys won’t leave.
Stay safe and healthy, my friends.
Thank you Lord.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
Thursday December 3, 2020
Good morning from Silty Slough. I’m awake at 5 it is 14 degrees here with only 5 hours to go until sunrise at 10:04. The sun will rise in the southeast just above the higher terrain behind the cabin and disappear from the southwest sky at 3:45. Five hours and forty one minutes to soak up the rays today. At least it is partly cloudy. The moon was big and bright when I went outside with the boys.
Kari cooked the turkey on Sunday and the Phillips came over for a nice meal. Now most of the leftovers are gone.
Monday the dogs needed some exercise so we went down to the slough and widened, packed, and straightened the airstrip in case anyone wants to land their ski plane and deliver ice cream. Butter pecan, moose tracks, or vanilla would be fine. A little dogleg to a water hazard may be ok on the golf course but on the winter landing strip not so good. The strip is in pretty good shape now ready to mark with lath and black garbage bags that will show up in the snow. It helps with your depth reception when landing. I was told once after a firm landing in a DC9 that I must have the depth reception of a full grown piss ant. That’s why I liked the 747, there is a little man somewhere downstairs that calls out your height above the runway. Yes I know I go to wedding perceptions too. It snowed another foot Monday night and continued during the day Tuesday.
Roger and another neighbor Andy Franks were going to go to the post office and asked if I wanted to go. I thought about being a woos and just staying inside but it was warm so I decided to tag along. It was still snowing pretty good when I left the asylum. I made one pass down the runway in about a foot of snow. On the way back I could see the headlights headed my way. Right on time. Our watches must be circumcised. They were each pulling a tub sled and didn’t slow down, I joined the parade. I normally ride wearing a helmet and contacts, but a helmet, hearing aids, and glasses don’t play together very well. I only have two pairs of contacts at the cabin and am saving them for the trip to the landing. I have more at Wolf Lake. Don’t know why Kari let me forget them there. It is warm so just a face mask is fine. My glasses fog up when I’m not moving and the snow builds up on them when I am. The light is very flat and it is hard to see the one lane trail. Roger is leading the pack, Andy and I are running on the sides to widen it out a bit. I’m running with my left ski in the deep snow and the right one in the trail. With my glasses iced and fogged up I’m just barely able to keep it between the white lines. Somewhere along the way, I fell off the left side and out into the really deep snow of never never land. I jumped over to the right side of the machine to bring it back and in the process hit the kill switch. Dead in the water, snow in this case. I have to hurry, if I get stuck and fall behind they will be pissed. I started my machine and was happy it popped right out and I steered it back to the trail. Our tiny parade made the left turn onto the Skwentna River, it is snowing harder now, big flakes that look like feathers. I can see that the grand marshal has stopped up ahead, Andy is stopped a hundred yards behind him and I stopped behind him. Looks like overflow on the river. Roger is digging and Andy goes down to help and also gets stuck. I wait on the high ground, we don’t want all 3 machines stuck. Roger finally got out, packed a trail, then went back and pulled Andy out. There was a slough off to our right. Roger headed over there and broke a trail on to the post office for us. We loaded the packages and mail onto the sleds and headed back down the river toward home. The trip back to Silty Slough was quick and easy without incident. Roger and Andy waved and I headed up our ramp and through the woods back to the asylum. What a tremendous amount of fun it was just to mail a handful of Christmas cards.
Tuesday night the rain started and it rained all night. I can only imagine how much snow that would have been. Wednesday we were breaking through the packed snow walking to the outhouse. I don’t like this because it is hard on Kari’s new knees and I can’t wear just my slippers. The rain reduced the foot of snow we had to about 6” of really good wet snow. Late in the day we decided to pack the trails and move the freight sleds up on top of the new snow. We each pull a tub sled, Kari’s is full of snow and mine is loaded with old batteries and snow. It didn’t take long to get everything packed. We decided to leave the strip alone. The first freight sled pulled out ok, it is narrower with narrow skis. The bigger one has big feet. Great for hauling a heavy load on a packed trail, but in deep snow not so much. I tied a 6’ tow strap to the tongue of the sled and hooked it to Kari’s machine. About 4 good jerks and it was out of its hole. A couple trips around the yard and a trip up and around the root cellar shined the skis right up. Shovel the outhouse and generator step and it’s time to call it a day. Time to polish of the rest of the turkey and have a Tiger Woods or two. Dinner and a movie in the frozen wilderness.
Thursday morning everything is frozen again. We made a good decision packing the trails and moving the sleds last night.
I posted earlier about the joys of snow machining. If you get a chance scroll back and read it. When we first bought our snow machines they were a toy to go out and ride to have fun. Now our snow machines are for hauling freight and our primary mode of transportation out here for 5-6 months of the year.
My disclaimer. The dates, times, and measurements may be misconstrued, but it all comes out in the wash.
Stay safe and healthy my friends, keep out of Walmart if you can.
Thank you Lord for watching over us.
I’ll be in touch.
Blue skies!!!
The View from the Outhouse 